Let me begin with a disclaimer on this post. I ,Thinkinfyou isn’t and has never been one of those girly girls that is totally disgusted by porn. In fact there was a time, that I could sit through a minute or two of a XXX movie without complaining about the total lack of plot ,or screaming with amazement at the abilities of a really good squirter….I still think that shit has to be staged,nobody has that much talent.
Today though ,I just can’t bring myself to watch porn,no matter if it has a super soaker in it or not. Now I know what you’re thinking ” Well maybe you’ve just finally matured Thinkinfyou and now realize that porn isn’t good for anyone!” and if you think that,well you are wrong. My dislike for porn doesn’t have anything to do with maturing . I’ve come to the conclusion that this is about as mature as I’m going to get and I’m OK with that. What I’m not OK with and has fuel my desire to swear off porn forever is the horrible faces people make in them right before the money shot. They totally killed my XXX viewing pleasure.OK,so maybe that picture is a little exaggerated,but honestly have you ever really studied the face of a porn star,or anyone who’s having sex for that matter? If you haven’t trust me,it’s not pretty. Don’t believe me? Fine, I have some examples to prove my theory against porn. Let’s take the latest sex tape everyone is talking about, The Chelsea Chelsea Banged a Wang tape. Now , I normally love Chelsea Handler . I think she’s quite funny,but one look at her fuck face and well…there’s just nothing funny about it.It’s just sad, really sad.Sad because I look at her face and after I grab and cover my burning eyes for a couple minutes screaming “MY EYES ,MY EYES” I started to think of all the potential lovers that will never want anything sexual to do with her again because they have seen and are scarred by her fuck face too. Now, I think she knows that ,so has since come out and said that the whole sex tape thing was a joke,but you can tell by that picture that is an authentic fuck face,you can’t fake that shit. And if she was really going for a funny sex tape I think she would have had enough sense to have have sex with Chuy. The oddity of it would have drawn people’s eyes away from her fuck face,plus I think she’d have made a lot more money from the tape too because let’s face it people love midgets!
But Chelsea isn’t the only person with an horrendous FF.I believe we are all cursed with ugly fuck faces in the heat of the moment.Never looked at yourself doing the deed and don’t believe you could look that bad? Go have sex in front of a mirror,and don’t try to fake it to make yourself feel better,that doesn’t count. Don’t feel like having sex,but still want to see if you have an ugly fuck face? Well, you could always go and stuff your mouth full of anything that is near,it will give you the same effect. Because I truly think that all the orifices in our bodies must be wired to mimic one another when filled. Seriously…Take a look at the guy above.What do you see? I bet you think that he is having one major nic fit,OR is he really getting a huge hit to the sphincter!?!I guess we will never know because the face is the same either way.
How about this innocent woman,is she just enjoying all that mixed parts goodness,OR is someone underneath tickling her naughty bits?You see what I’m talking about now, you know you do! I guess this is why your mother told you not to talk with your mouth full. Not because it’s a nasty disgusting habit where people can see your food,but because they can also see your fuck face,and that’s just not right.I personally believe fuck faces should be kept private, and only to be shared between two people who love one another. Not to be broadcast for all the world to see because honestly, a fuck face is a face only a lover could love.