May 10, 2009

OK, I lied. I am nowhere near the point where I’m about to show anybody my tig o’ bitties. Because no matter how big the damn things are right now, they look worse than someone who went five rounds with Mike Tyson, and although I can say that I walked away with both of my ears intact, the same can’t be said for my nipples… they’re still bandaged. But all the Percocet that they have me on is making me feel like everything is going to be A-OK. If only all the itching would stop.I swear, that’s one thing I learned really quick in my quest for breast mastery is that pain killers stop the pain but replace it with a horrible itching sensation ,which might not seem like much of a side effect to people who have full dexterity of their arms, but for someone who can’t raise the roof like John McCain… it fucking sucks.

Another thing that has bothered the shit out of me this week is I’ve found I don’t function very well on drugs,in fact writing just that last shitty paragraph took me since Tuesday afternoon till today to complete. I’m still not very happy with any of it,but then I remembered my last post comments were where my loyal,slightly perverted, but still lovable readers told me that they were more visual learners, so to not disappoint them nor myself with lack of posting,I felt the need to blog about what my chest does not look like anymore.

So I set out looking.I scoured the internet for some time trying to find the perfect photo that would give anyone who saw the picture a mental scar on their brain that might require medical treatment after viewing such a monstrosity as my old boobage was. My search was futile in finding perfection though,for some reason typing in” tits that hang as low as testicles” didn’t turn up a personal photo of yours truly, so I had to settle for these two beauties and ask y’all to use your imaginations to place my face.
I picked this one because I thought it showed how low they really hung.Of course, I don’t have nearly as sassy as a smile as this lovely lady.
This photo I really don’t think needs an explanation,but I’ll give one anyways. I thought it was a shiny example of no matter how low they hung….I never lost an ounce of class,and that’s what it’s all about. Well that, and healing for me right now. So keep your fingers crossed and I’ll keep my breasts bandaged until they finally look like this….



  1. Breasts are a huge responsibility ….. I’ll keep an eye on things – tee hee

  2. Awwww, So glad to hear you kept the nipples.. Keeping my fingers crossed that they aren’t the ones crossed. Don’t worry about writing, although if you’re as drugged up as I think you are, I’m still surprised there aren’t some funky pictures being taken..

    Glad to hear you are well though..and no longer hanging to the floor.. πŸ™‚

  3. Thank you,DP for being the responsible one!

  4. I hope my nipples are still intact,Nipsy. I haven’t really inspected to much of anything,that I can remember. Last week is nothing but a blur to me,but had tinges of buyers remorse for me. Hopefully I’m coming out of the clouds.

  5. Hello gorgeous — glad you’re back!! We’re all glad you survived and are back blogging. Don’t worry about the itching. Also, an easy home remedy for it it to mash up 3 or 4 aspirin with a little water and rub it on the itchy spots. It’s made of salycilic acid which reduces inflamation and the subsequent itchings.

  6. WOW! I’ve never heard of that remedy,Sass. I’ve have to keep it in mind if I’m ever crazy enough to elect to have a surgery where I’d have to take them again. I’ve been coming off them and haven’t had any in two days,it’s amazing the side effects that stay with you for up to a week after I’ve heard. I still feel,nauseated,dizzy,I’m not sleeping well and when I do sleep the dreams that I’m having are sooooo disturbing. I’m just hoping for normal again some time soon!!

  7. WOW! I’ve never heard of that remedy,Sass. I’ve have to keep it in mind if I’m ever crazy enough to elect to have a surgery where I’d have to take them again. I’ve been coming off them and haven’t had any in two days,it’s amazing the side effects that stay with you for up to a week after I’ve heard. I still feel,nauseated,dizzy,I’m not sleeping well and when I do sleep the dreams that I’m having are sooooo disturbing. I’m just hoping for normal again some time soon!!

  8. You’re not going to post a picture of your nips?

    I did! Mine not yours.

    Only fair you reciprocate really.

    Good luck with the healing.

  9. Well we’ll have to wait and see,The Jules. I do understand that it is custom to always return the favor when someone is kind enough to nip flip for you!Don’t think it went unappreciated!

  10. The Jules just guaranteed herself a steady stream of traffic.

    Well, good to hear you came out of it all right. You’ll be laying out on the beach in a too-small bikini top before you know it.

  11. Uh Shawn….The Jules is a guy. As for the too small bikini top…what the hell is too small!?!

  12. There’s a whole bucketful of disappointment for you over at this link, Shawn:



  13. Shawn is somewhat of a slow learner,Jules. You might have to let him see what the kids call the “willy beard” before he believes you!

  14. D’OH! Sorry, Jules. There will be absolutely no need to see any sort of beard.

  15. LOL! Oh,I believe there is plenty of need for beard sharing here,Shawn! Don’t get all shy on me now!!

  16. I am totally fekkin jealous. I want my tits back where they go. I am not sure how firm tits on a somewhat saggy chest would look like though. I would probably have to have a chest augment too. Big hooters on a saggy chest would look blech! By the way, Percocets suck for just the reason you described.

  17. That’s why you’d have to have a lift and an implant,Ettarose. I wasn’t able to just have them put in an implant and BAM,everything was good. No, they had to go in and lift all the excess skin that was all my three children left behind. I still feel like crap a week after,and have really cried a bunch about feeling like a made a mistake,but a lot of people say that most feel this way until a couple months in and they see the real results!! So keep your fingers crossed for me!!

  18. Hope you feel better soon, those side affects sound miserable, but before long you’ll look back and say “what was I worried about?”, chin up! And no surgery on the chin, it looks perfect.

  19. Awww thanks so much,Gitwizard!!

  20. Hi there. I’m glad you’re back to blogging. I missed your posts!

    Get well soon!

  21. You’ll get thru the muck and be enjoying the boobages in no time! Keep your head up and arms down. πŸ˜€

  22. Thanks,TCC!

  23. Patiently waiting for pictures.

    Glad to hear things went well, and if you could score an extra Percoset script or two, that would be swell.

  24. Thanks,Joe! As for the percocets….I flushed em!!

  25. This is like a really GREAT blind date: Straight to boobage, and we don’t even know your first name…


    Glad you’re back!

  26. I actually wrote a post about guessing my first name a long time ago.http://writingquietsthevoicesinmyhead.blogspot.com/2008/07/rumpelstiltskin.html

    Nobody even came close,and now I think that ThinkinFyou fits me better!

  27. I can’t relate, because mine are the size of plums. But I’m kind of partial to the Queen Mother’s…

  28. Plums are great,Mary! As for the Queen Mum,I think she got where she is today from her great rack!

  29. I know that your hands are full right now, or will be, but as I mentioned earlier, I’m a good judge when it comes to silicone or saline boobs. I’ve given the thumbs up to several pair, and I wouldn’t want you to be left out.

  30. That’s awful sweet of you,Don. I’ll keep that in mind when the healing is through.

  31. You did what??? What the hell? I leave you for a couple of weeks and you go and do something foolish…

    You didn’t post the moobs? How could you commit such an oversight. Shameful really…

  32. You left LL,and looking at moobs lost all it’s luster to me. So I decided to go out and resurrect a monument if you will,in the honor of all the lickable moobs out there. And honestly….did you really think I’d let you be the only one with a hot rack!?! I think not!

  33. There’s something about the Queen Mum picture that makes me think pole dancing with a flowered hat….that was hysterical….Don’t worry, i’m sure your boobs will come out looking more like #1.LOL
    ps – my sister had that done twice; it’s painful as hell…

  34. Your sister had them done twice,Surveygirl!?! Why? I tell you what once was enough for me!!!

  35. Re: my sister – I think they started slipping or something; she went back to silicone. Oh by the way, I’ve been thinking about your “boob” dilemma and it’s probably too late now since you’ve had them done but if there IS a next time have you considered the UNIboob? I mean, one might be cheaper than two and i’m thinkin cleavage might be alot easier to accomplish if you don’t have one goin’ to the left and the other to the right. ps Chuck Palanuik (spelled wrong?) is awesome = Monster was deeply disturbing…

  36. LOL! The Uniboob,Surveygirl!?! How would you find a bikini that fit after that!?! I’m just glad it done and over and now I’m glad I got two!!

    I’m such a Chuck lover too! He is very disturbing but brilliant!!!

  37. wow – i love this site. I kind of puke and get turned on at the same time. How did yours turn out, let see some pics =-)

    • Walt,
      If you read on to newer posts ,you’ll see that I offered to show if I was shown,and for that I got a content warning from Google.

  38. cosmetic surgeries these are very very popular because most people are very conscious about their appearance ,*;

    • Vanity can be a curse,Socket Set!

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