These Boobs Were Made For Blogging

May 2, 2009

Mark your calendars people!! Because May 4,2009 is a special day for me and all mankind. Now before you go running out to buy greeting cards to send your loved ones on such short notice for this special occasion ,or start speed dialing your boss asking him for the day off, I need to tell you that this festivity has yet to be recognized as a national holiday. I know it’s sad but true.Rest assured though,the day will come that it will be soon,and it will be all thanks to me.You see this Monday, May 4Th, I will begin my Breast Quest when I go in to have my breasts resurrected and in turn, I’m making the world a better place.
Now, if you find yourself puzzled in how this will affect the world, I am here to tell you that I am not just going through this process because I miss my loved ones that disappeared without a trace eleven years ago after breastfeeding my third child,leaving nothing behind but nipples that hang so low they trip me up when I walk. No, I’m doing it because through my quest for breasts, I intend on becoming a guru for people that are clueless about breast augmentation. I can promise you now, that I’ll be here to answer any question of the T.I.T. topic. Anything you want to know,hit me with it…no question will go unanswered.
I will admit at this moment I still have questions myself that I ponder about my breast quest.Tons of things, for instance, ” I won’t be able to raise my arms up past my shoulders for a couple of weeks ,so how will I deal with not being able to shave,and looking like I have a Sasquatch in a head lock after a couple of days?” I know, that thought scared the shit out of me too,until I came up with a couple of brilliant solutions to this quandary. See,I’ve decided that I’m going to take on a fake European accent so if anyone says anything about my massive pit hair, I’ll just act like I can’t comprehend what they are saying,and if that doesn’t work I’ll just tell people I’m growing my pit hair so I can give it to Locks Of Love because I’m a giver like that.
Either way, I think it’s obvious that I have put a lot of thought into all the intricate details of breast augmentation and I’m ready to take on the role of The Breast Quest Guru. So if you’re up to coming along with me, I say get ready with all the questions you can conjure up and I promise I’ll take the time whether I’m hopped up on painkillers or not to answer your questions,and boob school you!



  1. I just want to make sure that you’re doing this for you, not for me.

  2. LOL!DD,believe me I’m doing this selflessly to educate the masses.So remember if you have any puzzling breast questions that boggle your mind,I’m just the girl that can answer your questions!

  3. Yes, please keep us…abreast…of your progress.

    “Sasquatch in a head lock.” LOL!

  4. Will we be getting lots of post op pictures? We do better with pictures.

  5. I am so happy for you … I mean, er … the masses and can’t wait to see the results!

  6. I think I’m OK with breasts. But if you ever have any work done, you know, down there, I’d welcome a full tutorial.

  7. Yay! That’s all I have to add.

  8. Shut up, Douglas! I want her to do this for me!

    I have lots of questions, TFY, but I’m more of a visual learner…

  9. Are you just having the two done, or are you considering a spare?

  10. If you use your breasts in their present condition for blogging how on earth are you going to manage when they become all perky? …. inquiring minds need to know ……

  11. I am not, of course, asking this on my own behalf. I would never be so forward. But a shy friend of mine … yeah, that’s it, a friend of mine … wants to know if your blog will include before and after photos; purely for educational purposes, of course.

  12. I will,Bill! I plan to try to post hopefully daily, depending on the effects of the drugs!

  13. I will,Bill! I plan to try to post hopefully daily, depending on the effects of the drugs!

  14. Seems to me Joe,that I have a lot of “visual” learners!

  15. Thank you ,Tony! It’s just my way of giving back to the world!

  16. DD, trust me,all system are a go down below.No Knife needed!

  17. Ha Ha!A comment from DB!! I’m shocked!

  18. Well Philip,let the questions fly!

  19. Hmmmm, I never thought of that,DP. Maybe I could go ahead and tack my keyboard up on the wall and type like that….it could work.

  20. Tell your “friend” Joel that most likely there will be pictures!

  21. Going from what to what? I mean if you were to gather them up and stuff them into a bra, from what to what? I am curious. I am also jealous. You are young getting it done. I would look better if mine were just a little more to the south of the equator, but who wants to see 50 year old perky titties?

  22. LOL!Ettarose, When I gather them up and stuff them into a well padded bra,I’m a 34C,but I was a nice D before I had children. I’m having a lift and then implant to get them back there.
    BTW,spending a bunch of time in a PS office lately,there is no age limit for plastic surgery. Perky boobies look good on anyone!

  23. Firstly, I’m upset that there were no pictures of actual breasts.

    The least you could have done was post up a catalog shot of the model of boobs you chose.

    Secondly, I’m confused as to why you need to shave if you can’t move your arms above your shoulders.

    I mean, if you can’t do that, then no one can see the hair anyways, right?

  24. How did I know that you be upset by the lack of actual breast shots,Mike.

    I will be posting more about this experience,so there will be breast shots coming.

    As for the armpit problem,if you let it grow for a long time it doesn’t matter if you have your arms up or not that shit will billow out!

  25. I’m am a professional when it comes to judging the quality and appearance of augmented breast. My sister-in-law, cousin, two female friends all asked me to judge their’s . It was a hands on experience. If you need a professional, objective and honest opinion about the noobs boobs let me know. I’m there to help…good luck.

  26. Don,with you being a professional and all, I was wondering if you wanna help me out with any questions that I can’t answer? You know,from an educated male perspective.

  27. So I haven’t been able to come by until today and had to see how you were doing! Low and Behold – High in the Sky – wow! Hmmmm.


    You crack me up girl.


  28. Ha! And when you walk around with that European accent and unshaved pits? Don’t forget to leave your legs unshaved too!

    Ick and ewww!

    Good luck with the surgery madam, may the force of the breasts Gods be with you!


  29. Loved the “russian prom queen” look, with the pit hair and all..LOL

  30. MONICA!!! How have you been? I need to pop over and see for myself. Thanks for the visit!

  31. MONICA!!! How have you been? I need to pop over and see for myself. Thanks for the visit!

  32. Ugh,Quirky I didn’t even think of that! I’m afraid I’ll look like a well stacked sasquatch by the time this is over!!

  33. I know Surveygirl, isn’t she lovely!

  34. When it comes to the female physique, the hirsuteness or otherwise of pits aren’t high on the priorities of most men I know…………..

    Hope you’re pleased with the results BTW.

  35. So you don’t mind hairy pits,Gitwizard? I guess I just like certain things in an unnatural state.

  36. Hurray for boobies! Good luck with the surgery! Can’t wait to see the final result! 🙂

  37. Thanks so much,Sass!

  38. Hi Friends,Very nice blog, thanks.

  39. You are just too damn funnee!

  40. Hey, you’re probably under the knife as I type this. Hope everything turned out okay! Good luck on your recovery.

  41. here it is, May 4 and I’m wondering about your boobs – how it all went. Hope you’re enjoying legal painkillers. I’m jealous! of boobs and legal pharmaceuticals. Can’t wait to hear about both boobs and the wedding 🙂

  42. im pretty sure that axillism is the act of armpit sex, im sure some loser is probably wacking it to the armpit picture right now too.

  43. I swear your comments section has it in for me.. I left one already dang it..

    Hell if I can remember my witty remarks now..

    Best I got is congrats, and we want pics..before and after.. I’d even let you keep em covered..

    Good Luck my friend..

  44. just found you and have to say I love it. and looking forward to the pics to come

  45. Well…??? Well…???

    Inquiring minds want to know…

  46. Bill, I promise I’ll get something out there soon. I don’t write so well hopped up on these pain pills as I thought I would.A lot of things didn’t turn out the way I thought either….like the whole armpit thing? Well yeah that like part of my actual boob now. The doctor said it will go down but having multiple chins this week has me nervous. I do intend on getting a post out there as soon the itching from the pain pills stop….I really don’t know how people get hooked to these things….lots ahead coming soon!!

  47. I volunteer for the post-op audit to ensure they are a quality product and that you got your money’s worth! 😉

  48. Happy Mothers Day!

    Many Blessings.

  49. Thanks so much,Bill!

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